Joined: Mar '11
Location: United Kingdom
Age: 55 (M)
Posts: 7371
There are times when being a nice guy backfires on you, people can sense you are a nice guy and can take advantage of this, so i agree that being a d**k can sometimes work to your advantage
Joined: Apr '11
Location: Romania
Age: 35 (M)
Posts: 6669
Sorry to hear about the bad experience you had with your car, that really sucks big time... Lets hope that sooner or later your car will be fixed. I also tend to give you right, you need to be really vocal sometimes for your own good.
Joined: Sep '13
Location: Bosnia and Herzegovina
Age: 37 (M)
Posts: 1564
if i were to shout at every restaurant i ate and didnt like their food... but yea, maybe we should actually start doing it already though... as it is now, they can do whatever they want because most people dont want to get into fight over their food quality or whatever, because you know, that wouldnt be polite thing to do.
well its not polite to serve us cats food either, because some restaurants are that bad but people are too nice to fight for it. I swear my cats food smells better than many things i tried in 'decent' restaurants. It probably tastes better too :/
but yea, lets not hurt their feelings, so they can keep on serving us cats food
Joined: May '13
Location: Mauritius
Age: 32 (M)
Posts: 2688
Haha yeah if you a nice guy you will get crushed by people in the long run and get abused by people and you will lose something out of that. It might be money or anything else but being a nice guy most of the time is a bad move. So branch out and be a bad ass for a while and enjoy life. Nice blog keep posting mate!
Joined: Apr '14
Location: Austria
Age: 54 (M)
Posts: 11
Stay true to yourself!!! You do not have to be rude to win in life. When you take the upper hand, deal from the position of strength (whatever that might be), and stay calm, in the long run you will live a longer and happier life. It is because our society in recent years has tended to the rude side that simple problems have escalated to unmanageable ones. In the end, it is mostly cooperation that has built the greatest things in this world and not competition. Competition is only a catalyst. Stay nice, stay true to yourself and develop an understanding that things in life will not always go your way. As the ancient Greeks would say "fighting destiny only leads to misery and ruin" - probably not always true, but an interesting statesmen nonetheless. Zen can be bliss but rudeness is always uncouth and can lead to an early death.
Being a nice guy, does not mean you have to be a doormat. Getting the result you want, mostly just requires assertiveness.
I feel that anger, rudeness or otherwise being unpleasant, mostly just polarizes a situation, where either you get your way, because they want to get rid of you, or you motivate them into never backing down. Being friendly yet assertive, makes it possible to resolve a conflict with both parties feeling good about it. You can always escalate, if all else fails.
I do know a few unpleasant people, that seem to get away with murder, because they are very skilled at it. They get results at the expense of others, but they often get the opposite, when they encounter someone they do not have any power over (e.g. like a civil servant, or a waiter that spits in their food).
TTG
