The time ebbs away slowly. You watch impatiently as the clock ticks away. Counting down to that moment.
Tens of thousands sit just like you, watching, waiting. Their eyes glued to their computer monitor. Every second that ticks away heightens the anticipation, the sense of impending urgency.
For this is the time. The time of judgement. when those thousands of people will pit their wits and enter into the greatest gamble of their, up till now, fruitless poker lives. They will fight to the death to gain what the poker gods bestow on only a mere handful. they are going to attempt that momentous feat of gaining a seat on the Full Tilt DVD freeroll...
Tens of thousands sit wating, but only 2700 will succeed. Two thousand seven hundred blessed souls. the chosen ones, and your name is destined to be one of those 2700...
Time stands still as the screen tells you its a minute to go. Nothing else matters. Nothing else is important. Sod the telephone that rings in the back room. Sod the wife who has falled down the stairs and broken her fibia in three places. Sod the fire in the Kitchen. This is life itself. This is all that counts.. I HAVE TO REGISTER..
The seconds tick away. 10 seconds. 9 seconds.. You have your mouse hovering at the ready like a panther ready to strike down on its prey.. 6 seconds.. You feel your heart pumping madly. You feel sweat trickling down your brow.. 2 seconds -- GOD PLEASE BE KIND TO ME...
ZERO - Its all systems go.. Suddenly it appears. That oasis in the driest desert. That shoreline when you are castaway in the boat of despair. REGISTER is shines like the brightest star in the darkest of night
Franticaly you hit your right hand mouse button. PLEASE GOD I WILL GO TO CHURCH EVERY SUNDAY IF YOU WILL JUST THIS ONCE BLESS ME..
And lo, the poker gods smile down on you. They have received your prayers and reward you accordingly. That message. Like Manna from Heaven it flashes up. " you are registered for this tournament.. good luck "
GOOD FRIGGING LUCK.. I dont bloody think so.. I havent been studying poker for four bloody years to rely on luck... I am getting that DVD if I have to kill women and children to get it. That DVD is MINE and all you heathens who do not believe in the power of my poker prowess will soon be cast down in a torrent of thunder, lightning and nut flush draws...
Heed me oh disbelievers.. That DVD is coming to me. The poker gods have spoken and shall reward me for my faithful servitude....You shall be cast into the poker wilderness whilst I shall enter alone into the promised lands of Phil Gordons final table and pleasre myself upon the fruits that are bestowed therein...
And so it comes The game is ready. I have made my plans. I have my strategy well thought out. I shall play tight. So tight that the others will feel me like a boa constrictor around their puny waif like necks...
Like a cobra, I shall strike when I am ready. I shall pierce their hearts with such venom they will be on their knees pleading for mercy, but I shall show none, for the poker gods have set me a task, a prophesy to fulfil, and like Jesus I shall complete the lords bidding.. I shall prevail...
I receive my cards and lo, the Ace and the king of spades. Moses had bestowed upon him ten commandments. I have but one.. THOU SHALT DESTROY ALL OTHERS.. And these are the tools the gods have given me, for to undertake their instructions...
With these two cards, the ace and king of spades I vow to do the till of the poker gods...
The others make their intentions known. They decide individually whether to test their wits against me. Six realise the futility of attempting to test my might, but three other fools think they have the power to overcome my rampage. Oh foolish mortals. Have they not read the stars. Have the prophets not informed them ?
Oh well, suffer the little ones. They shall inherit NOTHING. i shall soon make it known that I, yes I, am the chosen one. The luke Skywalker of Full tilt. The Daniel Son of poker. The Haryy Potter of online gaming,
I am the one they call, the special one...
Bring forth the community cards. Let them strike fear into the hearts of these non believers...
And lo the poker gods show their wrath at these insignificant fools. An Ace of Hearts, a King of clubs and a three of spades ( why they have put the three of spades their I do not know, but gods move in mysterious ways and who am I to challenge them ).
The turn card comes and its a seven of clubs. The poker gods must be testing my faith but I shall not waiver. They have blessed me with two pairs. I truly am the chosen one..
Finally comes the river card. Like the river jordan, this is where I shall be baptised into poker heaven. This is the card that shall initiate me into the sainthood of Full tilt poker...
But what card is this ? Another three ? This is most unusual, and certainly is not in the script that I am working from. But never mind. I have two pairs, the two highest pairs. The poker gods will not let me down..
Now please pass me the chips and let battle recommence..
WAIT A MINUTE.. THOSE CHIPS.. WHERE ARE YOU PUTTING THEM.. THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO BE COMING THIS WAY.. WHAT THE FRIGGING HELL ARE YOU DOING..
Oh lords have thou foresaken me. Has the mortal with 7 3 off suit been a greater servant than I. Did my prayers not mean anything to you ? What have I done to deserve this ? Am I to be cast aside so mercilessly having been the most fervant of disciples.. OH LORD.. PLEASE NO.. NOT THIS.. I CAN TAKE ANYTHING BUT NOT THIS. STRIKE MY WIFE, TAKE MY CHILDREN, BUT PLEASE DO NOT GIVE MY CHIPS TO THE DONKEY WITH SEVEN FRIGGING THREE..
But no, the gods have decided my fate. I am not to be the one.My destiny lies with the other mere mortals. My rise to poker sainthood isnt yet to be.......
Hang on, who the hell am I trying to kid. Bollocks to that. Theres no such thing as poker gods.. Who the fook am I trying to kid.. I just had my AK busted by a complete bloody donkey..
Joined: Jan '08
Location: Germany
Age: 37 (M)
Posts: 482
rated it up long but worth reading it i know this feeling so good, as i started with freerolls only for like 2 years. good written, awaiting new stories sooin
Joined: Apr '09
Location: Sweden
Age: 46 (M)
Posts: 47
It is time for my first up. This story is deserved to be read over and over again, not only for the sake of entertainment. No, you just described one of the most strongest feelings in poker. The feeling of hopelessness and betrayal. Very well written and hard to forget. Thank you for pulling a smile on my face on this rainy day champ.
Joined: Oct '08
Location: Canada
Age: 34 (M)
Posts: 217
It's a freeroll wut do u xpect ppl calling u with AA KK. Ppl will call with 2 6 os even 3 7 os anything. So all u gotta do is pray ur not the 1 getting sucket out on and take as much money as possible when r in a hand and u got the best out of it.
... post of the week for sure.
long but worth reading it i know this feeling so good,
up. This story is deserved to be read over and over again, not only for the sake of entertainment. No, you just described one of the most strongest feelings in 
