Joined: Feb '08
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a man walks into a bar and is telling jokes when he says theres this blond lady who .. then the bar lady interurts him and says OI IM BLOND and im a black belt in karatee and helen over there is blond and she a blackbelt in judo AND ANGELA OVER IS ALSO BLOND AND SHES A BLACK BELT IN NINJTSU SO ARE YOU SURE YOU STILL WANNA TELL THIS JOKE MATE the man replys na forget that i cant be botherd to explain it 3 times
Joined: Jan '08
Location: Canada
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lol thats a pretty good one, but danny just so you no for future use or anyone else there is already a joke thread just search for it next time, or if you want to read other jokes.... creates less multiple threads
Joined: Dec '07
Location: Denmark
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Hehe it's ages ago the other joke thread was made....I think it's ok with a new Ohh and great joke, im so blank when it comes to jokes would like to throw 1 in but i'll have to google 1 LOL
Joined: Jan '08
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oh yea granted that it was a while ago but im just sayin that way it can be relived and people can read the jokes already on there and stuff? no what i mean? but either way i guess it really doesnt matter and most of my jokes wont be able to be posted on here lol
Joined: Dec '07
Location: Denmark
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Sure I do, double post are never the coolest but since the joke thread has become very long and it is some time ago I "accepted" it But hey give me a sec I'll try and find a decent joke to fit the forum
------------ Hehe I found this 1 :
A little guy is sat at a bar when all of a sudden a thug smacks him in the face and says: "Thats kung fu from japan." A bit later the thug smacks him again and says:"Thats karate from korea." The little guy gets up and leves the bar. A short time later he comes back and smacks the thug knockin him out cold.He turns to the barman and says:"When that **** wakes up tell him that was a fuckin shovel from B&Q.
Joined: Dec '07
Location: United Kingdom
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A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked," Is my time up" God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live. "Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face-lift, brow lift, lip enhancement, boob job, liposuction, and a tummy tuck. After her last operation, she was released from the hospital. While crossing the street on her way home, she was hit and killed by a car. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 years? Why didn't you pull me out of the path of the car?" God replied,
Joined: Feb '08
Location: United Kingdom
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a man sits at home with his wife when the phone rings he answers and on the other end is ther doctor he says to the man i have some bad news your wife came infor tests last week but my office has been brocken into and my files all mixed up ,but dont worry ive sorted them all out and narrowed her illness to 1 of 2 things she either has aids or alsiemers the man well that dont help us what we meant to do doctor says ive sorted that to alls you have to do is drive your wife to the end of town and kick her the car and go home the man what god is that gonna be the doctor says well then if she comes home you know not to sleep with her
Joined: Jan '08
Location: Canada
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hahahah thats a good joke dannyjon.... heres another one..
a blonde woman goes to the drs office complaing that she knows 100% that she is dying. the dr goes how do you no that your gonna die? she replies i am dying everything i touch hurts, if i touch my head it hurts, if my touch my arm it hurts, if i touch my foot it hurts.... the dr expects her... and comes to realize...
Joined: Feb '08
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paddy and murthy are at war when paddy goes over a lnd mine and stats sreaming murthy shouts to him are you ok pad he replies no i think ive lost my legs so murthy says no you havnt mate there over here
Joined: Jan '08
Location: Canada
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lol heres another good one....
A blind man walks into a store with his seeing eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging the dog over his head. The manager runs up to the man and asks, "What are you doing?!!" The blind man replies, "Just looking around."
Joined: Feb '08
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lol an irish man goes into a builing site and asks the forman if there are any jobs the forman says yes what can you do the man says anthing at all so all so the forman syas well give me your name then and i will phone you so he says its padyys mcguiness the forman says how do you spell that the man replies keep the f in job
Joined: Feb '08
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hey admin would we be allowed to do our own films of us doing stand up and out them on here for others to seee as long as we follow the rules and there is no links or rascisam it would be good
Joined: Jan '08
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HAHA OMG that would be hailarious... insert your own stand up comedy act and best one wins something like i uno mob points or something lol that would be a really funny and good idea lol
Joined: Feb '08
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thanks but i dont think we would be allowed never know tho might happen anyway another one a teaher tells this lad off for poking a girl in the eye with his pecil so the boy says your fault you tlod me to do it she says when did i say poke people in the eye with your pencil he said well im always being told not to forget to dot the i's [eyes]
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i dont see why bankroll mob wouldnt allow that it would be the same thing if you uploaded that video on youtube and posted that video in here so i really think it woul dbe ok jus gettin ppl to do it
Joined: Dec '07
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Haha great jokes guy's
@dannyjon I don't think that would be a problem as xxxitaliaxxx13 said it's not any different from posting a link to youtube. So if you can't do it here throw a vid. on youtube I would LOVE to see it. I can only Imagine how funny this vid is gonna be Dannyjon trying to be funny after 2 six packs dangling all over the place
Joined: Jan '08
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haha i would definatly have to agree m3turbo lol that would be such a sight to see.. i really think that you should create that thread dannyjon and post your video lol!!
OHHH and m3turbo it was you that had your bmw stolen didnt you? what ever happend to that did you find it?
lol sorry if im bringin up a sore topic lol i jus hope to hear good news lol
Joined: Dec '07
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Yes I got my sweetheart back after 6 days 24/7 work to find it, the story is fairly long and written a couple of times, I really appreciate you showing interest but im so lazy that I hope you will read it in "YESS MISSION ACCOMPLISHED" in off topic I think. Thanks m8