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  10-Sep-14, 20:44   #1
Ha ha's +1 
dlkiv 

Joined: Aug '08
Location: Canada
Age: 51 (F)
Posts: 2558
#1

Foldem Holdem

A man came home from a poker game late one night and found his hideous harpy of a wife waiting for him with a rolling pin. "Where the hell have you been?" she asked.
"You'll have to pack all your things, dear," he ad-libbed. "I've just lost you in a card game." "How did you manage to do that?" "It wasn't easy, honest. I had to fold with a royal flush."

#2

Playing Poker with the Rent Money

"That bastard husband of mine wanted me to sleep with the landlord because he lost the rent money playing poker," the housewife told a neighbor. "You didn't do it, did you?" "I have to admit I did -- though with certain misgivings, I might add. What I haven't done, though, is tell my husband the rent is paid up for six months!"

#3

Uh Oh

A pro poker goes home with his wife for Christmas. Once walking into the house, he tells his wife "your Uncle is having an affair with his secretary. The wife knows and you might want to ask your mom who your real dad is." His wife goes, "How did you know? My Uncle and Aunt just separated and my real dad was killed in the Army." He says, "I'm a poker player. I can read men like books." His wife says, "I think I had better go home and pack my things." He says, "Why?" She says, "You will find out once your brother shows up."

     
  10-Sep-14, 20:53   #2
  0 
mgabesz 
Joined: Mar '11
Location: Hungary
Age: 32 (M)
Posts: 153
Thank you for the bit parts of humour. Always interesting to read special poker stories and comics even this kind of jokes. We poker players have a very special and unique own world and these give special colours for it.

     
  11-Sep-14, 00:45   #3
  0 
dlkiv 

Joined: Aug '08
Location: Canada
Age: 51 (F)
Posts: 2558
I use to post here quite a bit. Loved posting funnies. Glad you had a hahaha Smile

     
  11-Sep-14, 01:46   #4
  0 
mahdrof 

Joined: Nov '09
Location: Canada
Age: 47 (M)
Posts: 2367
Legend Worship Worship Worship Worship Worship

     
  11-Sep-14, 12:06   #5
  0 
dlkiv 

Joined: Aug '08
Location: Canada
Age: 51 (F)
Posts: 2558
Hey Love Heart Heart

     
  11-Sep-14, 13:13   #6
  0 
yout85 
Joined: May '12
Location: United Kingdom
Age: 31 (M)
Posts: 2016
I really like #1 Smile


Been trying to think of some of my own poker related jokes... but turns out it's not that easy....

     
  11-Sep-14, 13:48   #7
  0 
Twistyoursou 

Joined: Jan '14
Location: Portugal
Age: 49 (M)
Posts: 271
Nice Big Smile never actually read some poker related jokes, these are pretty good Big Smile Thanks for posting Blink

     
  11-Sep-14, 13:54   #8
  0 
dlkiv 

Joined: Aug '08
Location: Canada
Age: 51 (F)
Posts: 2558
No problem dear Smile

     
  11-Sep-14, 18:00   #9
  +1 
klash23 
Joined: Mar '12
Location: United Kingdom
Age: 38 (F)
Posts: 2243
Excellent post dlkiv.About time we had some jokes on here........
first two jokes were very good, so how about some more????

Last night I got thrown out of a casino......apparently I completely misunderstood the crap table.

What's the difference between a poker player and a dog? In about ten years the dog stops whining.

What’s the difference between prayer in church and prayer in a casino? In a casino, you really mean it!



Smile

     
  11-Sep-14, 18:36   #10
  0 
dlkiv 

Joined: Aug '08
Location: Canada
Age: 51 (F)
Posts: 2558
lol klash23 I use to post jokes on here all the time Big Smile Thumbs Up from me for yours as they made me chuckle Smile

     
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